Sunday, March 18, 2012
Who moved my cheese?
Transition is a hard thing sometimes. I am full of new changes. Some I am a little more comfortable then others. Changes in my life:
1. Released from my calling. Yes that was a good move and a necessary one. I felt strongly about being released. The aftermath is a little hard being in the same ward at least for a time.
2. Ward changes-in the current YSA ward the bishopric has changed. I have no great desire for them to know me or me to know them because I am leaving soon. But what ward do I go to? The itty bitty branch or the ginormous ward? The itty bitty family branch is with my neighbors. Someone thought it was a great idea to put a few complexes together for a branch, putting all of the high turnover in one place. Seems like a great idea for the stake, but for people like me who are a little more stable it could be hard. Yikes! How hard is it to be in a ward with just newly weds and retirees. I just don't know. Bonus is that this ward starts at 9. The other ward is the massive mid singles ward for the southern part of salt lake county. 6 relief societies and 3 elders quorums. Bonus with this ward is that I would be in similar age and circumstance with these ward members, it's hard because of how many people there are. Truth is I want to meet people my age, for friendships or possible dating and marriage opportunities.
3. Friend transitions--Because I am changing wards, so too will some of my friends change. That is just how it works. You change things you do and some friends stay with you while other leave. Also some friends have gotten married. Yes they are still friends, but things are different and should be. Its just hard for me because I live alone. I need interaction with people and lets face it, facebook isn't going to cut it.
4. Family transitions--So I have said this before,my brothers are both serious about girls. One is for sure getting married in May and the other it looks like will sometime in the near future. I am happy to add people to my family, but its hard when they enter your family. They are both shy which means they are hard to get to know. Do they really want to be in our family? I don't know. I know they love my brothers, but I sometimes feel like they don't know what to do with me: the unmarried single one. I just don't seem to fit into categories that some people have.
President Burgess from the singles stake said that in times if transition that is when Satan comes after you. It's true... Because of these transitions I am feeling less motivation to go to church, to read scriptures, etc. I really don't want to go to church. I see myself as a faithful person, but I don't feel like I fit anywhere. I went to the family branch today and it was ok. People were nice enough, but the puzzle piece that is me, doesn't fit into this picture. Or does it? Would it fit in the mid singles ward? I don't know?
My life the way I was trained to go to get my cheese has been moved. Perhaps it means I will get a greater reward for going through my maze of life to the new cheese.
I have Guide posts in my life and need to use them.
What steps next: follow promptings, follow the teachings I know from the gospel. It will be ok. Those blessings promised to me will be rewarded in Gods time and in His own way. It will be worth it.